Un Jeff Andalou

Salvador Dali was said to be fascinated by the lack of surreality in reality - that of the many millions of things that could happen at any given moment, so few of them ever did. Supposedly, he was always surprised that, when he ordered lobster in a restaurant, the waiter never brought him a boiled telephone instead. It was this perplexing characteristic of reality that led to the creation of his famous objet d'art, the Lobster Telephone:

And so, in homage to Dali: I would like to record for posterity the phone message I received (in error) on my phone while I was away on vacation and which I only listened to last night. I would also like to say that sometimes I can’t believe how fortunate I am.
Here it is, though the printed word can’t quite capture the whininess of the speaker:

“Shane, It’s Matt. Hey, we opened those waffle cones and the whole tops of all of them are busted out. Would you call me back and, if you come up tomorrow, bring me another case and make sure they’re handled with care and then take this one back? ‘Cause, if they’re all busted up, heck, I don’t . . . uh, wanna have busted cones. Anyway, bring another box up tomorrow and take this one back or call me . . . or Linda.”

Once, years after he had used that line about the telephone, Dali was in a restaurant where a waiter brought him one in lieu of his order. Dali was inordinately pleased. I can understand why.