Jeff versus Blog

Annie Clark Cum Ron Mueck

2012-02-12T19:23:00.000-07:00

Would Have Been Better Two Years Ago

2012-02-08T12:49:00.002-07:00

The Enormity Of Their Flat Brain

2012-02-08T11:29:00.000-07:00

Aubrey Plaza Continues To Fulfill Her Mystical Duty To Be The Dark Zooey Deschanel

2012-02-03T14:17:00.002-07:00

M.I.A. Being Fun Again Is Really A Lot Of Fun, You Guys

2012-02-03T10:55:00.003-07:00

Thunder Strike, Indeed

2012-02-03T10:45:00.003-07:00

Sunglasses!

2012-02-03T10:39:00.000-07:00

Don Cornelius Wasn't Necessarily A Very Good Person, But Soul Train Was The Best

2012-02-01T11:09:00.004-07:00

and Soul Train was Don Cornelius.

So. Life continues to be complicated.

Happy Candlemas 2012!

2012-02-01T10:47:00.000-07:00

so, you know, light some candles and THIS or something:

Attention Planet Earth: You Have Eleven Months Or So In Which To Come Up With Anything As Great As This Breakdance Battle (Good Luck, Sucker)

2012-01-31T22:32:00.000-07:00

The Shortest Distance Between

2012-01-27T12:23:00.000-07:00

Moving Faster Miles An Hour

2012-01-24T14:25:00.002-07:00

She's A Summer Girl

2012-01-21T17:05:00.003-07:00

Chiara, trying on dresses for me, just came into the room to show me a recent purchase. She took a wide eyed look out the window at the clamshell sized snowflakes heaping down, made a face like a kitten that was just made to lick a lemon and said, in a little raspy voice: "winter."

That'll Do, California, That'll Do

2012-01-21T16:56:00.000-07:00

Etta James, R.I.P.

2012-01-20T11:22:00.002-07:00

Even though you were kinda weirdly bitchy about America's Sweetheart ™, Beyoncé, singing your song to the Obamas at the inaugural ball, I still have nothing but good feeling about you, Etta. I listen to your albums that I have all of the time, really and truly I do. I am sorry you died. Dying is the worst and you were the best.

You Guys, GRIMES (amirite?)

2012-01-19T13:37:00.001-07:00

A Little Justin Vernon Goes A Long Way

2012-01-17T19:48:00.000-07:00

I Just Need To Face The Facts . . .

2012-01-15T21:07:00.000-07:00

. . . I have a Wes Anderson film shaped hole in me somewhere that only a Wes Anderson film can possibly fill:

Swedes And Joshua Trees, A Love Affair

2012-01-15T20:45:00.000-07:00

Where Is This Village Where These People Live And Do They Need Any Me?

2012-01-15T17:46:00.000-07:00

Ghost Tonight? More Like BEST Tonight

2012-01-11T12:58:00.002-07:00

What Is This, THE BEST Day?

2012-01-11T10:21:00.002-07:00

There Is Literally Nothing Better Than This

2012-01-11T10:04:00.002-07:00

Alright Spain, Alright Italy, You Win

2012-01-10T18:53:00.001-07:00

All Lions Want Is To Eat Your Children

2012-01-10T18:51:00.000-07:00

Still Great

2012-01-09T14:56:00.002-07:00

The Best Part

2012-01-08T19:23:00.000-07:00

For My Money, Still The Best Sex Song Of 2011

2012-01-06T15:16:00.002-07:00

This Obvious Song For Your Summer BBQ Mix Is Six Months Too Early

2012-01-06T14:55:00.000-07:00

This Is The Most Beautiful Song And Video About Nosebleeds, Period

2012-01-04T13:43:00.002-07:00

If Wes Anderson Was Into Trash Rap Instead Of The Kinks

2012-01-04T02:46:00.000-07:00

2012 Already Delivering The Goods (And The Tiny Basketballs And Tiny Soccer Balls)

2012-01-02T13:26:00.001-07:00

This is For Your Hangover, Pysical Or Metaphysical

2012-01-01T17:00:00.000-07:00

2012 Welcomes You!

2012-01-01T00:01:00.000-07:00

This Is The Song And Video For The Last Ever New Year's Eve

2011-12-31T13:00:00.000-07:00

Ugh Life

2011-12-31T07:00:00.000-07:00

Well, There Goes MY New Year's

2011-12-30T11:34:00.000-07:00

French Inventors Continue To Not Invent Hoverboards

2011-12-29T18:32:00.000-07:00

Neanderthals: SOOOO anoying

2011-12-27T17:23:00.002-07:00

Happy Christmas!

2011-12-25T07:00:00.000-07:00

Look, we all know all about Christmas.

We all know about how it is derived from the Saturnalia and from the celebration of the virgin birth of Sol Invinctus and from Germanic and Scandinavian Yule festivals and, obviously, from Christian celebration of the virgin birth of Jesus Christ.

We know about Santa Claus and we know all the movies and all the songs and the cookies and the cakes and the roasts and the drinks and the lights.

And I am certain we all know how hectic it is this time of year when all we really want to to be able to soak it in like we did as kids.

so go soak it in and I'll do the same. who needs some rambling blog post about xmas, anyway?

Merry Christmas! (it's the bestest of the holidays, so enjoy the hell out of it!)

My Fingers Hurt Now

2011-12-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

You Are Welcome

2011-12-24T11:30:00.000-07:00

Top Eleven Of 2011

2011-12-21T16:05:00.000-07:00

After much consideration, here are my top eleven albums (which is not to say songs) of the year, and YES, i AM aware how WHITE i am:

1. St. Vincent - Strange Mercy

2. M83 - Hurry Up, We're Dreaming

3. Destroyer - Kaputt

4. Washed Out - Within And Without

5. Bon Iver - Bon Iver

6. Dum Dum Girls - Only In Dreams

7. Real Estate - Days

8. Tune-Yards - Whokill

9. Tom Waits - Bad As Me

10. Tennis - Cape Dory

11. now here is where i cheat, because i don't understand how to choose between Wye Oak's Civilian and Atlas Sound's Parallax and White Denim's D and James Blake's self titled album and i STILL haven't even listened to PJ Harvey's Let England Shake.

so:

here's the video for the runaway song of the summer 2011 and let's just pretend all of the above albums shared that 11 spot.

This Cat Jump!

2011-12-21T12:15:00.001-07:00

I'm Told You Can See How Awesome This Is From Space

2011-12-21T01:16:00.000-07:00

Is THIS What the Afterlife Is Like? If So Then Fine

2011-12-20T21:48:00.001-07:00

Some Songs Are Great Enough That Even Underwhelming Videos Of Them Are Necessary Viewing

2011-12-18T16:58:00.001-07:00

I Could Make A Whole Top Ten List Of Great Rappers In Front Of Brick Walls Making Me Fall In Love With Them

2011-12-15T10:46:00.002-07:00

French Inventors Cruelly Avoid Working On Hoverboards

2011-12-06T20:47:00.001-07:00

Natura!

2011-11-30T20:13:00.001-07:00

Good Call, Stereogum - It's Like They Made Twilight Into A Music Video (In A Great Way) And Smeared It With Eyeliner

2011-11-30T12:36:00.001-07:00

Record Contract In Three, Two . . .

2011-11-29T20:13:00.001-07:00

You Guys! The GirlWalk All Day Project, Part The First!

2011-11-29T18:42:00.001-07:00

Is It A Guilty Pleasure If You Don't Feel Guilty?

2011-11-23T10:41:00.001-07:00

Sometimes People Ask Me What It Is Like To Be A Lawyer

2011-11-23T10:18:00.001-07:00

It is pretty much like this:

Alright, Free Jazz Horn Freakout, I Accept You

2011-11-21T10:26:00.001-07:00

The New Feist Video Is Like A Nightmare Straight From Chiara's Id

2011-11-17T15:33:00.001-07:00

In that it features both CAMPING and THAT HAIR:

Somebody Remind Me About This In June, Because Right Now It Just Seems Cruel

2011-11-17T15:16:00.001-07:00

I Suppose The Adjective Is "Lynchian"?

2011-11-16T17:07:00.001-07:00

Perhaps It Is Very Late At Night And You Are In A Cab . . .

2011-11-16T14:09:00.001-07:00

. . . coming home from a date that has gone especially well and there is a light drizzle on the cab's windows and you are gliding through the neon encrusted caverns of your metropolis.

Well, here is a song for that:

You Guys: THE EARTH!!!

2011-11-13T20:52:00.001-07:00

He's Like They Made The Day Of The Dead Into A Guy

2011-11-08T18:30:00.002-07:00

Being My Response To A Request To Discuss The Greatest Sex Scenes In Art

2011-11-08T18:22:00.001-07:00

Is This The Official Themesong Of Winterlude?

2011-11-07T17:41:00.001-07:00

Probably! (ask me again when it is Winterlude)

Confirmation That SOME Close Is Definitely TOO Close To Be To A Whale

2011-11-04T16:19:00.000-06:00

Dogs! Also: Sweaters!

2011-11-04T15:06:00.002-06:00

Is French Photographer Guy Bourdin The Greatest Photographer Of All Time?

2011-11-03T14:01:00.003-06:00

YUP.

The 9th Symphony Of Synthpop

2011-11-03T13:54:00.002-06:00

I'm not sure this video really does anything for me. I mean, Akira; whatever. Mostly I just listen to this song so much that I felt increasingly guilty for not commemorating that fact on this blog.

Apparently, In 2011, You Must Be In Some Kind Of Small Watercraft To Have Any Kind Of Experience At All

2011-11-03T13:12:00.002-06:00

Also:

Pipes!

2011-11-02T11:30:00.002-06:00

Halloween 2011

2011-10-31T13:18:00.000-06:00

Halloween is one of the good ones, isn't it?

I mean, what a holiday! Masquerade parties! Candy! Ghosts! Draculas! Werewolf Barmitzvah! Mummies! Witches! Creatures From Black Lagoons! The Skeleton Dance! Horrible Monsters Defying Description! Zombies Intent On The Destruction Of Society Itself! Whatever THIS is!

So: All Hallow's Eve. Also called Samhain. The night before the Day Of The Dead. The Celtic New Year.

The good ones always collect lots of names. Here's the point, though: In many (most?) traditional cultures, there weren't four seasons, but only two. And this is the night that we pass from one (Summer, if you like) into the other. It is the transition, the cusp into the dead time of year, and so this is the night on which it is supposed that the veil between the world of the living and the world of the dead is at its thinnest, its most porous.

So definitely girls should wear their sluttiest costumes and we should all watch Peter Jackson's wonderful wonderful WONDERFUL gorefest Brain Dead/Dead Alive.

Whatever. Have a big bonfire and remember your forebears or go out and stuff your gob with twix. I don't care; just so it matters. Halloween has everything that a holiday should have and the wheel of the year is better for it.

The Chiara Heresies VI

2011-10-25T19:38:00.001-06:00

Chiara has some coworker with a teenaged son. The coworker (and her son) are Mormon and the son is of an age where he is about to go on a two year long Mormon proselytizing mission. The coworker is describing how, before the son can be sent to the city or region where he will serve his mission, he must first go through three days in the "Missionary Training Center" in Provo, Utah.

"What's the Missionary Training Center?" asks Chiara.

"It's like three days of intensive church, more or less," she is told.

"What?!" cries Chiara, "Three days of church?! That's the worst thing I think I've ever heard. I'd shoot myself!"

Pretty Much The Best Halloween Party I've Ever Seen

2011-10-25T14:54:00.003-06:00

More To Love About Drive: It Made Chromatics Release New Music For The First Time In Five Years

2011-10-25T14:52:00.002-06:00

Here Is The Quantum Locking Video You've Been Waiting (Your Whole Life) For

2011-10-18T20:56:00.002-06:00

Just Like Before, The Best Thing About This Friends Video Is The Amount Of Jennifer Aniston It Contains

2011-10-18T17:05:00.002-06:00

Breaking: Whales Too Big To Be This Close To

2011-10-18T14:09:00.002-06:00

Look, I Know It Is Only Monday, But I'm Pretty Much Ready For The Weekend

2011-10-17T14:40:00.002-06:00

Time For Our Monkey Bath!

2011-10-14T10:30:00.000-06:00

Indian Summer, Anyone?

2011-10-13T16:26:00.002-06:00

Only A Certain Kind Of Snide Yuppie Liberal Could Be Completely Thrilled By This Ira Glass Sex Tape (And I Am Such A Snide Yuppie Liberal)

2011-10-10T16:27:00.001-06:00

Take Your Medicine: A Tasteful Ryan Adams Song And Video

2011-10-10T15:31:00.002-06:00

What I've Learned: Pretty Girls Who Are Trying Too Hard Can Still Sing Pretty Songs

2011-10-10T11:32:00.001-06:00

Beyoncé Charm Offensive Continues (And Is Wonderful)

2011-10-07T17:18:00.001-06:00

Seriously, is there something or someone immune to Beyoncé? (that person or thing is BANISHED!)

What I've Learned: A Video Can Be Just A Beautiful French Girl Being Charming For Four Minutes

2011-10-03T10:14:00.002-06:00